What do I do? My life is a fucking mess. I moved out and everything fell apart. The little baby part of me wants to just go to my folks house, lock myself in the closet, and stay in there till I'm so hungry I start eating my leather shoes.
I lost my wallet, all my credit cards, my passport, my fucking life! I am a moron. The passport is taken care of, I went to the consulate yesterday and applied for a temporary replacement, which I can pick up 2 days before I leave for Australia. Better then nothing. But all my money is gone, my bank account is overdrawn since 75% of my appointments haven't been showing up, and I can't work till I get new cards. I leave in exactly two weeks and I have no idea how the fuck I am going to manage. I cry every fucking day, and I don't know who to even ask for help. I feel like a shell of a human. All I want to do is sleep. I haven't been this depressed since fucking Levi. Fuck fuck fuck fuckety fuck. The cards are in the mail, but who the hell knows when they will get here. I don't even know where the hell to start fixing this. As soon as I get back from Australia I will be packing up my shit once again so that N can take his place in the house. I will most likely end up crashing on my sisters couch, till... till god only knows what or when. I guess I will be able to work out of New York then at least. Or maybe I will just get a real job. Or maybe I really won't come back at all. I will run off into the Australian wilderness and live in a cave, feeding on tourists. I will eventually go mad, or more mad then I already am and die.
